Planet Phenomenal

"This “going through a man’s phone” is at best juvenile and immature, at worst indicative of personal..."

Tue, 20 Nov 2012 22:10:04 -0500

“This “going through a man’s phone” is at best juvenile and immature, at worst indicative of personal issues that need to be addressed before pursuing a romantic relationship with anyone. If a woman feels the need to check, then those suspicions whether unfounded or not should lead straight to an exit out of the relationship. What is the point? Work on your own internal conflicts, your trust issues, your insecurity instead of dragging others into your torrent of misery. And those men complaining about getting snooped on? Maybe stop cheating (hahaha I’m kidding. No I’m not) or how about screen your partner for potential childish behavior before getting involved. Just an idea.”

- Dash, If You Have to Check His Phone, Exit the Relationship

-‘The ‘Nice Guy’ Myth and discussions on the...

Thu, 01 Nov 2012 14:21:57 -0400

-‘The ‘Nice Guy’ Myth and discussions on the ‘Friend Zone’

"I am 26 years old and I Feel Lucky that I Have Not Been Raped. Sexually assaulted, sexually..."

Thu, 01 Nov 2012 14:06:00 -0400

“

I am 26 years old and I Feel Lucky that I Have Not Been Raped.

Sexually assaulted, sexually harassed, street harassed, followed, exposed to, leered at, stalked, butt slapped, butt and breasts grabbed, in public spaces, cursed out 987784 ways to sunday by men bigger than me for not responding to catcalls, physically assaulted for asserting agency over my or my friend’s safety, venomously berated for rejecting advances to my body and safety? Absolutely. Ooooof I lost count.

Lost count.

And THEN, I am asked to smile for a man I don’t know from a ham sandwich? And then I am asked to be more receptive to any and all advances and compliments from anyone with a penis?

Excuse me while I go break everything within a 5-mile radius.

When men start walking down the street smiling like clowns then we can have a discussion on women’s mean mugs. Until then, just know that it is a defense mechanism and you have NO idea what that woman has been through at the hands of men who were “just trying to give a compliment.” If your advances are turned down, so what? I have zero sympathy. Women are abused every second and still have to deal with men and the abuser apologists. That’s what we call life. Unfortunately.

With all of that, I have never been raped and I feel so lucky I haven’t.

Every woman I know has endured all of the aforementioned abuse and I know a lot of women, friends, acquaintances and colleagues who have been raped. They are the strongest people I know. I honor them. I respect them. I love them These are the three most singular virtues that men who subject women to this type of behavior are lacking. And the men who defend them and this behavior.

I am 26 years old and I Feel Lucky that I Have Not Been Raped.

Lost count.

And THEN, I am asked to smile for a man I don’t know from a ham sandwich? And then I am asked to be more receptive to any and all advances and compliments from anyone with a penis?

Excuse me while I go break everything within a 5-mile radius.

With all of that, I have never been raped and I feel so lucky I haven’t.

As I type this, I am boiling. I think of all the shit women endure and brush off every single day because of rape culture and pigs posing as men.

”

- Dash, I am 26 years Old and I Feel Lucky that I’ve Not Been Raped

"‎’Slut’ is attacking women for their right to say yes. ‘Friend Zone’ is attacking women for their..."

Thu, 01 Nov 2012 14:03:59 -0400

“‎’Slut’ is attacking women for their right to say yes. ‘Friend Zone’ is attacking women for their right to say no.”

- (via finedineonmyvegangenitalia)

And “bitch” is attacking women for their right to call you on it.

(via bigbobsbeepers)

empoweredafrolatina: Talk Back: Our Birthday Song FAANMail:...

Thu, 01 Nov 2012 14:03:47 -0400

empoweredafrolatina:

Talk Back: Our Birthday Song

FAANMail: “All I want for my birthday is to be portrayed as a human…”

empoweredafrolatina: glittergoldandlace: Glinda the good witch...

Thu, 01 Nov 2012 14:03:37 -0400

empoweredafrolatina:

glittergoldandlace:

Glinda the good witch unzipping into the wicked witch

This is great!

“The fact that this much-loved photo is a depiction of...

Fri, 12 Oct 2012 23:40:20 -0400

“The fact that this much-loved photo is a depiction of sexual assault, rather than passion, is an uncomfortable truth, and to call it out as such might make one seem to be a priggish wet blanket. After all, this sailor has risked his life for his country. Surely his relief and excitement at the end of the war is justified? Surely these are unique circumstances? The answer to the first question is yes. He is perfectly entitled to be ecstatic. He is perfectly entitled to celebrate. However, this entitlement does not extend to his impinging on someone else’s bodily autonomy.” Read the rest

Listen to Pardon Me Prod. By The Budgenson by BlaK...

Mon, 08 Oct 2012 18:01:00 -0400

Listen to Pardon Me Prod. By The Budgenson by BlaK OrFan.

lyrics

Hook 1X:
Pardon me/
But i got a bone to pick with you/
ya called me out my name & i was neva even rude to you/
Tried to stop me, not because you even like me/
Just wanna lay the mac, frontin like you got G/
If i chose not to speak/
Then Eff it, let it be/
It’s my perogetive, no need to call me a B/
I’m a woman, no need to throw ya shade @ me/

Verse 1 (A)
Probably had a day/
Didn’t haves shit to say/
Damn can sister get an F’ing brake/
Did you ever think I couldn’t stop because I’m running late/
Or probably didn’t like it when you hissed like a snake/
Or plain simple fact/
I just don’t stop for anybody/
Gotta see your heart and what you embody/
Before I give my first words/
Your eyes have to em line my mind/
Cause straight up brother I ain’t even got the time/
To listen to the garbage or the silly ass lines/
If you’re gonna stepped to me come correct like a don/
Cause I gets down with the realest words bond/
If you’re with it then come on/
I might bend an ear if your smooth as chiffon/
I like a bother who keeps promises where upon/
He feels my necessities and plus beyond/

Hook 1X:
Pardon me/
But i got a bone to pick with you/
ya called me out my name & i was neva even rude to you/
Tried to stop me, not because you even like me/
Just wanna lay the mac, frontin like you got G/
If i chose not to speak/
Then Eff it, let it be/
It’s my perogetive, no need to call me a B/
I’m a woman, no need to throw ya shade @ me/
It only makes ya look bad & shows ya immaturity/

Verse 2 (B)
My, my, my, Well don’t i look fly/
Bred in the stuy, so i’m conditioned not to say hi/
To these lames, playing games, claiming that they try/
To get they bread up, fed up with this little thing called life/
Don’t get it twisted, you & i created equally/
Just hope you own that buildin you posted in front of G/
Until you sign that deed, then you can come to me/
You’ll surely bag me with your home owners vocabulary/
You know the main reason why i didn’t stop?/
You been there since i left & you’ll be there when i come back/
Like ya stuck-hold up! then ya called me out my name?/
In 93’ the queen been set it straight/
Your a king, i’m a queen as soon as you realize this we gon beam/
But i can’t wait i got a date with a brother named Naheem/
Don’t know much about em’ yet, but i know he got respect ya mean?/

Verse 3(A)
Sorry to disappoint you/
Imma to disjoint you/
There’s nothing about about my character that will ever ever enjoy you/
So I’d rather keep it moving/
Cause your style is disapproving/
And by the looks of everything I’m very content my conclusion/
(B)Hold up, you thinkin cause you swole up, you could say anything & like paper we gon fold up/
Brotha grow up?
This is just juvenile/
You’d be a hot boy if you ain’t talkout the side of ya mouth/
(A)And don’t hate me cause I don’t like your style/
(B) I might change my mind if i think it’s worth my while/
(A)At the end of the day
You still remain dismayed
Afraid to be rejected by a woman who’s made
And the very next time you come checking for me babe
Cut the bullshit and the lame foul play
(B) A yo & step up ya game to a trillion as they say & all that verbal masterbation…keep it comin that a way
(A & B) Hey!/

Hook 2X:
Pardon me/
But i got a bone to pick with you/
ya called me out my name & i was neva even rude to you/
Tried to stop me, not because you even like me/
Just wanna lay the mac, frontin like you got G/
If i chose not to speak/
Then Eff it, let it be/
It’s my perogetive, no need to call me a B/
I’m a woman, no need to throw ya shade @ me/

credits

from From A II B *UNCENSORED*, released 22 August 2012
Prod. & Engineered By The Budgenson

"I completely understand the possibility of rejection. Really, I do. I empathize. It sucks. Sometimes..."

Sun, 07 Oct 2012 22:46:26 -0400

“

I completely understand the possibility of rejection. Really, I do. I empathize. It sucks. Sometimes can be hurtful and awful just UGH!

But don’t let how others have behaved in the past taint and/or negatively impact your demeanor and that’s really a life lesson anyway.

What I am asking is just basic human courtesy. That’s what every woman wants. That’s what everyone wants. I’m going to make an educated guess on that one.

And I, because I can only speak for myself in this case, will always respond in the same manner as I am approached. And I’m going to even go so far as to say, so will a lot of other women. If it’s humane and polite, even if I am not interested, I will extend the same treatment you gave to me. You smiled at me, I’ll smile back because I like when men smile. And you’re probably handsome when you smile and I like handsome men. If you come incorrect I will be even more incorrect. I will be just so wrong. Just flat out, plain, dead up erroneous. I will fail that exam. On purpose. That’s fair. Dontcha think?

There ARE some women who are unnecessarily mean and hurtful when expressing their disinterest. They may or may not be decent human beings. We’ll never know. Why bother trying to find out? There’s nothing here to see. That’s life. I feel your pain but I think my little piece of advice actually makes the stakes less steep and lessens the risk because “hello” is not salacious, it’s not controversial, it’s not un-PC, offensive or inappropriate. Hello is just that, a greeting. A basic human gesture. Start a conversation off of that, a BRIEF one. She will respond and you will get her attention IF she is interested. Pinky swear.

”

- Dash, Quick Note to Guys on Picking Up Women

Photo

Sun, 07 Oct 2012 22:43:45 -0400

Personal Experiences with Rape Culture: ohfuckitsoprah: toned-tanned-fit-andready: Yesterday, I asked guys in...

Sat, 06 Oct 2012 16:47:49 -0400

Personal Experiences with Rape Culture: ohfuckitsoprah: toned-tanned-fit-andready: Yesterday, I asked guys in...:

ohfuckitsoprah:

toned-tanned-fit-andready:

Yesterday, I asked guys in my shop class if they had ever yelled at a girl/group of girls walking/jogging/running from their car window(s). They all said they had at least once. So, I thought I’d pick their brains and I asked them why they…

"You guessed it, a gun. A *&^%ing GUN!! I looked at my friends and we were gone. Ghost. The wind...."

Sat, 06 Oct 2012 16:42:37 -0400

“

You guessed it, a gun. A *&^%ing GUN!! I looked at my friends and we were gone. Ghost. The wind. I ran track since the age of 10 and at this time I was on the track team at Temple but I had never, ever, ever, ever, ever ran so fast in my entire life. This man really had a gun. And really showed it as if he was going to use it. Because I wouldn’t dance with him? Because I wouldn’t give him my number?

From that day on, I never went to a party like that one. I rearranged my entire approach to going out and socializing. I was way more cautious in the way I turned down guys. To be honest, that guy put fear in my heart. I was angry about it. I am still angry about it. Why must I be afraid to say no? Why must I be cautious in the way I reject a possible suitor? When did it become ok for men to treat women who reject them like animals? I know not all men act like dogs in heat and I know that is a wildly extreme situation. I was at the wrong place, at the wrong time, with the wrong person who clearly had the wrong upbringing. But the fact that the name calling, the cat calling, the grabbing, the staring, the grunting occurs and will continue to occur, angers me. Men need to do better. Women need to raise their boys better. Until we make some changes, I’m sure there will be more and more stories like this one.

”

- The Harassment Monologues: Nexus Learns the Hard Lesson of ‘Urban Courting’

alostbird: [TW:...

Thu, 04 Oct 2012 15:46:54 -0400

alostbird:

[TW: rape]

slytherinmyswagkorra:

icedtea-for-elephants:

countlessuntruths:

icedtea-for-elephants:

slytherinmyswagkorra:

one-hundred-lifetimes:

I recently understood this scene like a month ago. I hadn’t seen this movie since I was about 7 years old and this part always confused me because I didn’t understand what he was thinking or why she got offended. I just thought she was mad that he almost caught her

… same…

oh god wait just this movie wow

Wait what? Can someone explain?

He sniffs her hair and, well. He’s molesting her and Esmeralda knows he’s doing it. So when she confronts Frollo and he goes ‘oh, just thinking how you’re going to die’, her answer is pretty much a ‘no, you were thinking of raping me’. To which Frollo responds a very rape-apologist ‘Oh, of course a slut like you would think about that first, and it’s your fault that now I’m thinking about that as well’.

Wtf? I did not even notice he was sniffing her hair. Omg. What a creep.

oh my… oh my

I just

wow

Yeah not to mention the entire song he sung about her

Disney movies and the man-woman relationships are very disturbing and definitely reflective of rape culture.

Welcome to SHYB: OMG GUYS

Thu, 04 Oct 2012 15:46:08 -0400

Welcome to SHYB: OMG GUYS:

do-the-panda-dance:

In my Adolescence and Emerging Adulthood class today, we had a guest speaker.

GUESS WHAT HER TOPIC WAS. GUESS. NO WAIT ILL TELL YOU.

It…was…BODY ACCEPTANCE.

She talked for an hour and a half about how the media is full of lying, sack-of-shit photoshopping devils, and…

FREE American Jiu Jitsu Self-Defense seminar

Tue, 02 Oct 2012 16:17:55 -0400

Dear Friends,

New York Jiu Jitsu would like to announce our next American Jiu Jitsu Co-Ed Self-Defense Seminar and Introductory Course.

FREE American Jiu Jitsu Self-Defense seminar

On Monday, October 29^th from 6:00-7:30pm, New York Jiu Jitsu is offering a 90-minute seminar in which a certified black belt instructor will teach you a selection of fundamental self-defense techniques that can be used immediately.

This seminar will be a great way to help keep you and your loved ones safe this summer as well as a fun, exciting introduction to the martial arts. This seminar is open to both men and women. Space is limited, so please contact us at 212-343-8310 or info@nyjiujitsu.com to enroll. We are conveniently located at 666 Broadway, entrance on Bond St. (between Broadway and Lafayette Ave.)

American Jiu Jitsu Introductory Course

Beginning on Monday, November 5^thfrom 6:00-7:00pm, New York Jiu Jitsu will be holding an American Jiu Jitsu Introductory course. This 4-week program is a great way to begin your study of the martial arts or to get back into regular training.

In this course you will learn the underlying principles and techniques of American Jiu Jitsu self-defense, including defense against punches and escapes from grabs. You will learn how to effectively use your entire body to defend yourself from a much larger, stronger and more aggressive attacker. The 8-session course will meet Monday and Wednesday at 6:00-7:00pm from November 5^th to December 3^rd. Cost for this course ($120 until October 30th) includes free uniform rental.

To register for this course, please visit us or call at (212) 343-8310. Space is limited, so register today!

The new documentary It’s a Girl explores “a social...

Tue, 02 Oct 2012 15:39:03 -0400

The new documentary It’s a Girl explores “a social machinery that says we don’t want females.” via Global Fund for Women

Watch the trailer

Bully Calls News Anchor Fat, News Anchor Destroys Him On Live TV...

Tue, 02 Oct 2012 15:09:00 -0400

Bully Calls News Anchor Fat, News Anchor Destroys Him On Live TV via Upworthy

“Do not let your self-worth be defined by bullies”

Say something!

"The lyrics are quite clear on a reality too many women have to face when asserting their choices..."

Tue, 02 Oct 2012 11:51:53 -0400

“The lyrics are quite clear on a reality too many women have to face when asserting their choices with their bodies. When the man is asking, it is always the woman’s choice. It is always her consent. I do not care if she told you at 12am she was going to ride you like the rodeo, if at 2am she changes her mind, that. is. her. prerogative. Get it through each and every last one of your heads. Her body, her choice. Forever. And ever. In every situation. Of all time.”

- Dash, ‘I Said No, because That’s My Right and Prerogative‘

'Half the Sky' Premiering TONIGHT on PBS

Mon, 01 Oct 2012 15:54:24 -0400

The subtitle ‘Turning Oppression into Opportunity for Women Worldwide’ explains the content of the book but it doesn’t prepare the reader for the heart-wrenching tales of oppression endured by women from all over the globe. These tales are of resiliency, phenomenal strength and a true will to live and flourish under harrowing circumstances. I urge everyone to read this book. It will change your perspective, if not your life. The multi-part documentary series based on the bestselling book by Nicholas Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn, will air on PBS October 1st & 2nd, 2012, and internationally in 2013. Described as ”a landmark transmedia project featuring a four-hour PBS primetime national and international broadcast event.”

TUNE IN TONIGHT @ 9pm More info

"It’s funny. You know those guys that claim to be ‘nice guys’ and then proceed to tell you how bitter..."

Mon, 01 Oct 2012 15:43:09 -0400

“It’s funny. You know those guys that claim to be ‘nice guys’ and then proceed to tell you how bitter they are that because they’re ‘oh so nice’ none of their female “friends” have given them “any” and they’re jaded and pissed about that? Yea, you’re not a nice guy. Because you’re a man who is breathing does not ‘make you a good catch.’ And not one soul on this planet is obligated to give you “some” or a drop of “any” just because you’re so called, “nice” or even a “good catch.” So keep that in mind when you’re doing a woman favors, when you have ulterior motives. Hello, my vagina is still attached to me, not you, me, last I checked. Just a friendly PSA. Oh and P.S.S having ulterior motives isn’t really all that ‘nice.’ Upon finding out a woman you are interested in is taking advantage of you and does not return the same interest, it is up to you as a capable human being, nice having nothing to do with the tea in china, to lose her. Basic human self-preservation tactic. If you have ever “complained” about being a nice guy, you’re not nice. If you were genuinely nice, as an element of your personality, you wouldn’t have to tout it. You wouldn’t be enraged because of it. You wouldn’t deem yourself ‘finishing last’ because of it. You’re an asshat and since there’s that widely held misinformed belief that all women like asshats and jerks, you’ll be bedded soon enough, but not because you’re nice.”

- Dash Harris, ‘The ‘Nice Guy’ Myth’